Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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