Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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