I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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