i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
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