Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
