Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize