You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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