I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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