Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
