I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
