please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
