best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
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