Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
