a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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