Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
