Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I need moral support for this bender
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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