Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry luv2lafme2 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(214): View more from Texas

I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.

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(614): View more from Ohio

at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?

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(954): View more from Florida

in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers

(1-479): View more from Arkansas

trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow

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(226): View more from Ontario

Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?

(226): View more from Ontario

Don't answer that. It is bad.

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(801): View more from Utah

He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.

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(407): View more from Florida

Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.

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(623): View more from Arizona

I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.

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