Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
