She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove