he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize