wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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