You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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