i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Randomize
