Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize