If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
