Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
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you have to choose: penises or morals?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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