Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I've blown a few things in my day
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize