dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Can you bring me the toilet please
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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