I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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