You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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