Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Randomize
