did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
too bad you live with your parents still
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
