I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize