Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i can't believe i had my finger in that
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
