So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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