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So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize