I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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