Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
