My first STD was from a foam party
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
