So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
