If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize