Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
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