Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft http://tfl.nu/ob1j
  Replies (26) Good night (998) Bad night (4523)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream. http://tfl.nu/v6je
  Replies (37) Good night (6874) Bad night (659)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me. http://tfl.nu/iup7
  Replies (12) Good night (708) Bad night (4538)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat? http://tfl.nu/t2jr
  Replies (19) Good night (744) Bad night (7059)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door http://tfl.nu/oj7i
  Replies (57) Good night (1478) Bad night (9633)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement. http://tfl.nu/3rgn
  Replies (25) Good night (4787) Bad night (1447)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing. http://tfl.nu/eukd
  Replies (36) Good night (1289) Bad night (3382)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished. http://tfl.nu/1qri
  Replies (10) Good night (5354) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again. http://tfl.nu/1ovr
  Replies (5) Good night (858) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose. http://tfl.nu/kcg6
  Replies (8) Good night (1384) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I was drunk

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Please answer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex (312): I was drunk (312): Please answer http://tfl.nu/4zur
  Replies (16) Good night (578) Bad night (2539)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault. (1-314): Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/fjsh
  Replies (5) Good night (1260) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress. http://tfl.nu/zrup
  Replies (1) Good night (663) Bad night (339)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work. http://tfl.nu/gsqk
  Replies (1) Good night (240) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested. http://tfl.nu/b8k3
  Replies (8) Good night (767) Bad night (406)

Randomize