I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."