Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Randomize