Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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