she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
