The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
