You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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