I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
