I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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