Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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